I’m SO Excited!
I am gushing all over myself with pride and gratitude! Thank you India, Fatal and H.H. for nominating me for The Fabulous Gutter Blogger Award. *sniff, sniff.
How it Works (yes, as a matter of fact I have been to an AA meeting or two!)
1. Thank the person who nominated you…verbally, orally? Anally? With cash rewards or flowers, nubile virgins, sex toys? You can be the judge of that. Just find a way to show your deep appreciation. You know you love to be praised.
2. Link back to their blog in your post. (For me this is as simple as a backpacking excursion in the Himalayas in high heels, a gin martini in one hand and a cigarette in the other. I hope for you nominees that your computer skills are better than mine.)
3. Post the image of the Award on your blog. (phew! It worked!)
4. Copy and answer the six questions from their blog post.
5 .Nominate nine bloggers, (or nineteen, if you are terrible at decision-making.) link to them and let them know they’ve been nominated.
Here Goes Nothin’
1. What’s the kinkiest thing you’ve ever done?
I’ve had sex in an elevator, which is quite tame in comparison to the rest of you but, I refuse to make something up! I’ve had sex with this Robert Smith-ish looking goth guy who’s bed was like a double coffin. (Unfortunately he really is deceased now.) I guess I have never done anything very kinky. I’m still hoping some kink might fall on me at this late stage of the game. Who knows.
2. What do you now know about sex that you wish you’d have known earlier in life?
How essential it is for your sanity. How trying to ignore your own sexuality is hopeless and ridiculous. That faking it gets you nowhere, that not only is it just fine to masturbate, it is really a gift and an excellent way to find out how your body works. If I had a daughter, I’d buy her a vibrator for her tenth birthday. (before ten, she would have to make do with her fingers.)
3. Is there any gutter fantasy you’d like to try? (tell us what it is.)
I guess every person’s definition of “gutter” fantasy is different…the gutter is usually a dirty place to be in both senses of the word so, I took it in the butt a few times before I really “lost my virginity.” because I thought that way didn’t count, just like oral sex. So, I’ve had anal sex, been sodomized, whatever, many times since those innocent teenage days but I think that although I’ve been willing, it has never really worked. So that can be my “gutter” fantasy. Someone with whom I can make that work and be intensely enjoyable for me and that person. Possibly dirty in every sense of the word.
When I was younger, I was horrified at the idea of being with a girl. Maybe I was horrified that I would enjoy it. I don’t really know but now I think I would like to experience sex with a woman as I am sure there is much to learn from new experiences and I am sure that it would be incredibly sensual. Beautiful probably. (That is a “non-gutter” fantasy.)
4. What’s the funniest bedroom situation you’ve ever been in?
I wrote about my absolute worst bedroom situation in another blog award post. It is only funny now. To make a long story short…go here.
Has gutter blogging taught you anything?
Gutter blogging has taught me so much about myself, my sexuality, what I really want. Sometimes I read my own posts and I almost have to remind myself that I am the one writing them. Prior to writing this blog I was sort of disassociated with my own sexual being. This literary endeavor has brought the “sexual me,”and the “everyday me,” together a bit and has also brought so many amazing people into my life…
I’m not a religious person but there is something really awesome about finding each other this way. Like Divine Intervention. I learn so much from what my fellow gutter bloggers (and un-gutter bloggers) have to share and from their advice and encouragement as well. So thank you.
6.What is your favourite post from the person who nominated you?
Well, I was nominated first by Beautiful India at Work Spouse Story and my favorite post by her is “I Wrote a Letter.” (Yes, I suck at linking. I feel like giving up.) She is an ex-pat like me who crafts a sultry tale and she has excellent taste in music too. I was also nominated by my Sweetness Fatal and my fave by her is here. (really I adore everything that she writes. She is sort of like a mirror for me, sending me images of myself in her words and I love her.) Last but not least I was nominated a third time (I am truly gloating!) by my friend H.H., I always wonder what that stands for…Highly Happy, Happily Horny? He writes pulsating stories of his erotic life with a younger women with loads of appetite. My favorite post by him and Lo is here.
Now the Hard Part
I don’t like to choose between so many bloggers who deserve recognition. I speak for myself but I’ll bet many of you are quite easily miffed or maybe even heartbroken when left on the bench, for me this is just leftover emotion baggage from cheerleading try-outs (they can burn in hell!) from the Snowball at Skate City in fourth grade and also three years of misery on the junior high basketball team (yeah, I’m tall. Nope, I’m not coordinated at all!) but I’ve tried to nominate friends that I think might appreciate being nominated. I wish that I read more new bloggers because otherwise all of this can become quite cliquish but I can’t even seem to keep up with the writers I already follow. I’m not going to nominate the people who nominated me although they are more than worthy.
1.Gillian, at Tin Women Press, My Fairy Blog Mother. She’s incredibly talented in and out of the gutter and without her encouragement I would have quit writing before I even got started.Thank you. Je t’aime.
2. Accidental Masturbator, My First Follower, my friend and a fellow chronic self-lover who shares the same marital problems that I deal with in an often funny, poignant manner. I kiss you in French and in English. In the gutter!
3. Hy, Number Three in the 100 Top Sex Bloggers in the English-Speaking UNIVERSE! A beautiful women who writes beautifully. She touches my heart, every time.
4. Théo Black, My Héro, he is sweet and sexy and his cyber presence in my life makes the world a happier place. Plus he once told me I reminded him of girls he used to get drunk with in high school. I’ve loved him a little ever since. He is an excellent writer and he knows gutter.
5. Sophia, Saucy married sweetness with lovely photos too. I thank her for always appearing when I feel sad and giving me a little hug! She is a Blog Angel.
6. Jayne, Her words are light and airy and full of wonder. She lifts me up some days and we share tears on other days. Really I don’t think she is that gutter because she is so far above the ground but her words are quite stirring…
7. Noodle, is sexy and writes exquisitely. A very fluid read (Can I say that?) and another blogging pal I would love to really meet.
8. C.C. A bit like me, she is working her way into the gutter! We didn’t say some words before, but now she is getting good at it! She is an excellent and prolific writer.
9. Truth is telling a story that is hard for him to live through, like all of us I guess, but he does it really well. A sexy and honest blog(ger.)
I have to mention
diirrty, because he can be SO gutter and manages to arouse me at any given moment…but I didn’t nominate him because he doesn’t do awards. Plus I had to choose 9.
Faded, is not very gutter but he is terribly sexy. In case you don’t know his blog, he is so talented and…dominant.
Sandee, is my new friend and she is not gutter at all so far but I sense that there is a seed of smut planted deep inside her just waiting to be discovered. (Maybe I’m wrong, maybe not!)
Molly, is younger but seems like a blogging older sister to me, she tells a very explicit tale and is a great writer to boot. Thank you Molly for always looking out for me.
Kyle, My Chevalier. I reckon he’s in love…not much gutter going on chez Mew these days but he does it well! He’s really funny, too.
I nearly forgot My Link Master. Sacha! He taught me everything I know about linking and I love him for that. He doesn’t write gutter much but I’m sure that he would be great at it if he
felt like it. He has a HUGE imagination!
Hmmm, I wonder if you would like that “non-gutter fantasy” come true with Lo.
She’s a bit far away though! 😉
Bisous You Two,
Dawn
This unpeeled some very interesting layers …
Oh, and you are terribly sexy too.
What layers? You are making me nervous! I feel naked.
(Thanks for finding me terribly sexy. It may be all I have ever wanted to be.)
Bisous,
Dawn
Simply layers of you.
As Mr. Cohen wrote : I need to see you naked in your body and your thoughts
I would have a tough time choosing my better side. (Neither?)
Personality or body?
Yeah, I mean I don’t know if my naked body would be more appealing than my naked mind or the other way around. Probably safer staying fully clothed! Warmer as well.
I am loving watching this award go around! I just wish I had more time to follow all the great blogs I’ve been introduced to.
Dawn, your words are just lovely and you always make me feel something. You will always be a favorite of mine. You are very deserving of any awards given to you!
Oh thank you! I am so touched! I think we are going to get along well…
Bisous,
Dawn
I think so, too! Kisses right back at you. 🙂
Save a little excitment – another nomination is already winging its way to you.
And you flatter me, as ever.
Brilliantly funny piece of writing, even if it is a serious and august occasion.
No wonder you get showered with awards.
And other good stuff:-)
Thank you my friend! I love showers!
Big Bisous,
Dawn
It’s all true…you know it. What nomination??? 🙂
(I refuse to link. Ever again. Ever ever!)
xoxo
This nomination.
And when you say you love showers … actually, no, I probably shouldn’t go there. (Tee hee.)
We’re working on using our gutter words. Thanks my dear Dawn. 🙂
I’m tempted to say, “Fuck yeah!” LOL! You are very welcome! 🙂
Yay! Congratulations on your award! Thanks for reminding me that there are other ways besides verbally of thanking someone — anally, hmmmm…
And thanks so very much for the shout out! You are absolutely right — the smut lies just beneath the surface with me. I’m afraid really that I could frighten people with what goes on in my mind. hehehehe! I hope you enjoy the rest of your day!
I KNEW it!!! You can write under a different name….
Happy Monday to you!
Bises,
Dawn
🙂
Thank you Dawn, and congratulations on your recognition. What is it about the gutter that makes me so happy?
well done well done well done!!! you deserve it of course, and well done on the linking; you’re flowering more and more with every bit of blue-highlighted-underlined word
funnily enough i have a guttter piece in my drafts that i was writing just for you – it’s a true story but i was writing it down for you to read – i may even finish it next year!!
and i would love to work on your assarse…
beautiful award bisous
x
🙂 Thanks! I can’t wait to read “Gutter by Sacha!” (My assarse needs a lot of work. Believe me.)
Bisous Linking Me to You,
Dawn
i’d be happy to excercise it! i think you’ll like my gutter….
Thank you, ma belle. I am immensely flattered.
🙂 I’m sending you a big hug!
There you are! I was freaking out.
Why freaking out?
I don’t know…it was like I had lost you. 😦
Oh, honey. I’m not going anywhere … I’m just in a bit of an identity crisis! LOL
You can listen to me live online on the 22nd at 11pm EST over here. http://tinwomanpress.wordpress.com/2012/12/04/elene-sallinger-dishes-live-on-blog-talk-radio-on-1222/
Cool! Thank you Ma Belle Jumelle! Je t’aime.
Dawn,
Thanks for being such a darling. I’m glad you enjoy that piece of mine… it’s one of the pieces I’m most, if not the most, proud of.
Et Je t’aime aussi, ma gloire du matin. Dois-je gâcher notre très belle amitié en te disant que je serais heureux de répondre ((ou satisfaire? Je ne suis jamais sûr de ce mot…)) à ton fantasme blog de pas-gouttière?
xoxo
Nous serions les chattes de gouttière ensemble! Meow!
Big Bisous,
Dawn
Purrrrrr. =P
xoxo
Oops! Not gouttière…canivaux! I forgot. Gouttière is awning! That would be too acrobatic!
xoxox!
oh lord. o.o Haha. The things we could get into. tch tch.
❤
Sweet Dawn, I am loving your responses!
And damn, I have never had sex in the elevator… I am too scared
you have to tell me about all the technical details, maybe I’ll try that one day!
I read that post on my blog you linked to… started all sort of thoughts in my head. I have to write about it… him, at some point again.
It was exciting in the elevator but it was less risky than it sounds…come to think of it it was with the same coffin guy. He was a wild one! Maybe I’ll write a post about that. (otherwise I’ll just tell you.) Thanks again India! It has been fun participating and now I can link nearly effortlessly. Nearly…
Big Bisous,
Dawn
Thank you Dawn! Blog angel – what a sweet title!
You definitely deserve this award. I’m so glad you are finding your sexual self – so important! Sad that you can’t act all of your sordid fantasies out just yet – but I think there is still time enough for all of that ; )
I hope so…it may be the end of the world. Lucky for me, I know angels!
Bises,
Me
I am horrible for just seeing this. You are so sweet to me and the things you said were so nice. I almost want to say that I don’t deserve you but I can’t be that mean – even to myself! I was looking for Gillian’s Tin Woman Press site and this came up on the list. I got into your answers and saw that you nominated me! I’m sorry I am so lame and didn’t respond. I’m working my way to one big award post – you’ll see. XO, Jayne
Today you would probably be number one on my list. I love you and we have an eerie correspondence. I never reply to any blogger awards anymore. I’m not much of a team player I guess.
(not that I receive that many but…)
Love to you from me,
Dawn