Dude Magnet

In my every day life, I am not much of a Dude Magnet. I am tall and sort of skinny, a bit awkward still at 43. Some people find me shy although I am not shy at all. I am easily startled, shaky, jumpy and more or less not all that sure of myself. I have a huge need to be liked by any passer-by. Everyone. It’s tiring sometimes. I can’t understand when people don’t like me and I guess I’m lucky in the fact that usually everyone does. If I was a dog, I would probably be an over-eager, friendly Basset Hound. Like Bassets, I have shortish legs and a very long torso. And a very long neck. I’ve always felt that I am a variety of beautiful that women recognize, covet sometimes. I’m less sure if men find me attractive or not, but then again I’ve never not had a man for any extended period of time since I was of age for all of that. Dude Magnets dress trashy, have really big tits that they manage to slip into every conversation. I have a half-empty (half-full, let’s be optimistic!) push-up bra. I fear appearing masculine to men because I’m taller than loads of them. I never, NEVER pee in a restroom reserved for men, even if there is a State Fair mazing line to get into the lady’s room. I’m afraid someone might think I am a transvestite. Sometimes in the bus, if the driver doesn’t look directly at me, he might say, “Monsieur” which totally ruins my day. I feel devastated  for hours after this kind of slip-up.

I do have several redeeming qualities though. (phew!) I have a lot of ass. Not Jennifer Lopez but kind of like that. A winning smile. Flat stomach. I work out a lot when I’m not smoking compulsively or drinking. I am strong. I can do several push-ups but not as many as Mrs. Obama. I find her totally horsish. I guess I have the type of body that looks good in clothes, better than out of them. People find me surprisingly nice. I don’t take myself too seriously. Which leads me, finally, to what I really want to write about. I’ve already explained in earlier posts how much I like going to clubs. I have always loved the lights, the dark, the loud music, the throbbing beat. It is exhilarating to me. I love how people’s sexuality just starts to ooze out from under their everyday costumes. Mine does as well.

Men in everyday situations don’t hit on me much. When I’m waiting for the bus (I don’t have a French Drivers License. I’m terrified at the thought of driving here.) anyway, at the bus stop, I’d say a good 90% of men check me out, even ones that are with their wife. I hate those guys because my own husband can never make it past a bus stop with a girl waiting without giving himself fucking whiplash. I can always see it coming from miles away. Otherwise, I’ve never met a man in a grocery store or even a café. I wish I could say I have met men at the library because I spend a lot of time there and would be relieved to know that my prospect was literate, hélas non. When I think about it, alcohol has always been present when I meet someone who is gonna do me. Regardless of weather or not he knows. That he is gonna do me I mean. I usually know. In night clubs with loud music, darkness and lust, I am a Dude Magnet. I’m not bragging, it’s a fact like many others I’ve stated here. This is where this post should get seriously arousing but unfortunately my Real Life is beckoning although I prefer fiction. I’ll be back. After yoga. I LOVE yoga.


  1. Foster Drake

    If it is any consolation, my dear, I have never been considered a “dude magnet” either. In my daily life I give little regard to the physical appearance of women. I have a great appreciation for the beauty of humanity, but I look and see people. I don’t think I have ever experienced anything close to whiplash trying to see a lady. I would not be so deceptive as to say I only see the inner beauty, but I would rather hear a lady’s thoughts than see her figure. Beauty is a concept. An idea. Words form ideas for me. Centuries after death we applaud the beauty of people we have never seen, so let us do so now, while we yet live. All I can see of you here is beautiful, and I am grateful for that view, my dear. But enough with my tireless prattle. Thank you, dear for a thoughtful post. I wish you the most magnificent day!


  2. TheOthers1

    I’m not sure I’d consider myself a man magnet though I do get stares. Typically I’m not terribly concerned with how I look because of the environment I’m in. I’m a professor on a small college campus, not exactly the place to pick up guys (or is it??). If I take the time to dress up, I’ve noticed that I turn heads. I think it’s how you feel too. It’s nice to know others think you’re attractive. It does something to you.

    I like to think I only look like a woman, but I’ve been addressed as “Mr.” more than once. That usually depresses me for hours after.

    • pivoine68

      Me too! It’s odd to try to figure out exactly how you appear to others…you never really know i guess. I think a college campus would suit me! LOL! So young and eager…

  3. Accidental Masturbator

    If men stare at you at the bus stop, and you can pull at a club, why do you not see yourself as attractive to men? (Yes, I know that is a far easier question to ask than to answer, so probably rhetorical.)
    I also think you should give your husband a break on the whiplash – if you know he’s about to do it, it means you’ve seen the babe at the bus stop too, and you think she’s attractive too, and to quote “there’s nothing wrong with looking at the menu, as long as you come home to eat.”
    As for breast size – not everyone likes thermonuclear bazookas. Hand grenades can be pretty powerful too.

  4. Gillian Colbert

    Dear – We really are peas in a pod (though I’m short). However, Accidental has the right of it. When I’m at my most confident, men are most responsive. They are most attracted to confidence. Weirdly, the happiest time in my life was when I was pregnant and I was also hit on more during that time than any other period ever. It’s all about the brain first, darlin!

  5. notablyprettymiss

    Sometimes I get to thinking that I better be someone who doesn’t get stares at all as long as there’s one person who would give me all his attention beyond how I look, beyond what do and just completely for who I am.

    • pivoine68

      You have a point there. Men are lucky in that respect, I think they squander far less time hating themselves over physical appearance issues; Then again, I’m not a guy so I guess I don’t really know that for a fact.

    • Nick

      Is this effect because when you ladies are feeling ‘confident’ then you are much more approachable by mere men because you are more willing to engage with our feeble attempts at conversation? And, hence, whatever else?
      Gillian’s pregnancy effect – because you know you are walking proof of biological success, hence, more comfortable in your own skin, will this be the same effect as ‘confidence’?

      • pivoine68

        Hi Nick!

        I don’t really know. It is true that confidence probably makes you more attractive to others but then again I have no good reason to have more confidence in nightlife context than any other context, yuno?

        I’m trying to figure this stuff out. I think the fact that men assume you’re drunk or assume that if they got you drunk they would have more luck getting you in the sack has a lot to do with it. I can get myself drunk without anyones help and as for getting me in the sack, simply making me aware of those intentions would be more than enough. (I can be sort of clueless about that!)

        Take care! Nice to see you again.


      • lovesexandmarriage

        Abso-fucking-lutely! I’ve seen girls that are just normal, plain girls that would never really even turn a guys head. But when they are steeping in confidence, guys flock to them!

      • pivoine68

        I know! Even nearly ugly girls sometimes. They have something more solid…beauty fades but confidence probably sticks to the bones more.

        I wrote you another reply yesterday and it didn’t go under your comment. ? I don’t get it! Take care of yourself!

  6. Serendipitous Me

    “I’ve always felt that I am a variety of beautiful that women recognize, covet sometimes.” You always have been. The first thing I noticed about you was your stunning beauty. Not the mix-and-match blonde barbie beauty that women claim to attire to – but the ‘she looked different – a beautiful complexion, expressive eyes, a lithe and flowing body. the general sense that poets would write pages to your coltish, yet somehow feline, beauty.
    “I’m less sure if men find me attractive or not…”
    They always did before. But fear of rejection, finding themselves not worthy enough, or being caught wanting something they shouldn’t have… those keep them from acknowledging it. It doesn’t keep them from mentioning it to female friends though.

    You’ve forgotten – this thing that happens between 2? So often has an accomplice.

    • pivoine68

      Good point. Do we know each other? I suddenly feel undressed (and no where to go!) Thanks for your flattery (is that a word?) I think so. I’m hoping to find something that looks like self-worth before I become elderly, tired…..I guess I have some time to spare but it all goes so quickly.

  7. AR

    These posts about you are your best writing, I think. Real, and honest, I liked this one and part 2. I also love yoga!! Hot yoga is my favorite, I feel so alive afterward.

    • pivoine68

      Thank you! Sometimes after I post this stuff, I figure I am really crazed but then again it feels good to get it out of me, yuno?
      Yoga and writing are now my only two healthy ways to keep on going. The other ones work too, but they are not as good for me.

      Bisous to you,

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